Easter Eggs and Needless Thoughts

For days I’ve been trying to think of a funny line to share with friends on Facebook and Twitter about Easter. Why? Some people play sudoku, some people play Xbox, some people whittle wooden spoons. It’s just a way to occupy the extra hours and cranks the mental gears, I suppose.

Anyway, all I could think of was that it would be funny if someone tried to have an Easter-themed orgy. Occasionally I post messages about unsuccessful parties, proliferating a certain persona as a lonely and awkward bachelor that I’ve cultivated. It’s funny because it’s close enough to the truth that it can take a moment to read into my facetiousness – and people who don’t know me MIGHT take me seriously. And the idea of people confusing my fiction with reality cracks me up.

Having an Easter orgy is strange and icky enough that it’s already funny, but how to make it funnier? There was a newspaper clipping going around about slang that teenagers used over text messages to obfuscate intentions from their parents; it seemed like a serious article, but I think it was probably Onion-esque satire because it was so absurd. One of my favorite terms was “sex bbq,” whatever that means. So I thought, yeah, an Easter egg hunt / sex barbeque, that’s funny.

How to phrase it? To me, it’s a degree funnier if it’s more about me expressing my frustration that no one showed up to the party, and being sort of passive aggressive about it. Additionally, it’s also funny picturing me, by myself, eating a giant pile of boiled eggs and drinking cheap beer.

It works a little better on Facebook because I was able to write a little more. So that’s the amount of thought I put into a joke that no one will see. But it made me laugh!

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